


Selfishness Makes the World Go Round

by MeetTheRoyalMess



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: (just referring to where the characters go during the time skip. nothing too major), (kind of??), Brazilian Folklore, Canon Compliant, Fluff, Getting Together, Haikyuu!! Manga Spoilers, Long-Distance Friendship, Long-Distance Relationship, Love Confessions, M/M, Mutual Pining, Phone Calls & Telephones, Scared Hinata Shouyou
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-04
Updated: 2020-06-04
Packaged: 2021-03-03 18:36:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,176
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24540121
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MeetTheRoyalMess/pseuds/MeetTheRoyalMess
Summary: 'In all fairness, it really isn’t his fault. Nope. It was only an idea he had, stemming from the constant pull to be better—or, in this case, to be more “cultured.” How was he supposed to know that other people recounting their favorite legends would land him rooted to his living room floor with icy fear pooling in his fingertips?'--Shouyou spends one day trying to learn more about Brazil first hand and comes face-to-face with some of their most fearsome legends. So what else is he to do besides call Kageyama so he can keep him company?
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio
Comments: 16
Kudos: 115





	Selfishness Makes the World Go Round

**Author's Note:**

> Helloooooo. This is my first time writing something based on the canon timeskip so I hope it's okay! This is completely self-indulgent but I really hope you enjoy!

When Shouyou made the decision to train in Brazil, he had many expectations.

Of course, most of those expectations trailed along the lines of becoming stronger than ever before—which he is  _ succeeding  _ at, thank you. However, there was not a single one that involved him frantically darting around his apartment, flipping on every light he could get his hands on. (His bill is going to be  _ hell _ to pay but he really can’t concern himself with the extra shifts he’ll be forced to take right now.)

In all fairness, it really isn’t his fault. Nope. It was only an idea he had, stemming from the constant pull to be better—or, in this case, to be more “cultured.” How was he supposed to know that other people recounting their favorite legends would land him rooted to his living room floor with icy fear pooling in his fingertips

Legends are a common string among cultures—a point of interest—so obviously Shouyou had to seize this idea and run with it.  _ It’ll help me fit in _ , he’d told himself as he asked some locals to recount their favorite tales in clumsy Portuguese. And it had  _ worked, _ damnit; Heitor in particular told many simple stories with a sharp grin and chilling voice. Shouyou was delighted to hear every single one of them.

Unfortunately, that had only lasted until he reached his dorm and remembered that Pedro, for once, would not be there. The reasons evade Shouyou; they don’t really  _ matter _ when shadows are creeping across the floor with gaping mouths ready to consume him.

That brings him here: all alone in an empty space, terrified of nothing and everything.

Shouyou’s eyes flit around the room. Everything is lit but a really  _ weird _ feeling continuously crawls up his back. It settles at the nape of his neck and sends tingles straight down his spine. Without even thinking, he whips around to inspect the area behind him.

It’s all normal.

(Shouyou eyes the area for a few extra seconds for good measure though.)

Gradually, Shouyou manages to skulk back into his room, making sure Pedro’s door is firmly shut along the way. He finally steps past the threshold, rips his bag from his shoulders and leaps into his bed all in one swift movement.

He’s sweaty and disgusting and more than likely still has sand in his shorts, but he’s safe on his bed with his back crowded against the wall. Nothing can sneak up on him this way and that, in Shouyou’s book, makes the next trip to a washing machine completely worth it.

Yet, even in the comfort of his own space, Shouyou can’t shake the unease that plagues his gut. Hinges creak and groan, swinging the traitorous door agape. He whines, slinking further away from his door and curling his legs close to his chest.

He reaches in his pocket and yanks out his phone, fingers moving of their own accord and before he knows it, the speaker is pressed roughly against his ear. Shouyou breathes in time with the dial tone as he wills the trembling in his fingers to subside.

(Briefly, Shouyou wonders whether if this is a good idea at all. A glance at the clock tells him it’s around 7 AM in Japan so there’s no guarantee that he’ll even get an answer at all.)

There’s a click as the line decisively connects. Shouyou’s heart thrums audibly as it suddenly makes itself at home in his dry throat. The silence is more deafening than anything else and Shouyou’s teeth clamp down on his lip.

Then finally— _ finally _ —a sleep-soden voice croaks, “ _ hello?” _

The hot iron of delight rams straight in the middle of his sternum, stirring every organ and iota in its reach to enthusiastic life. His heart flutters and his cheeks stretch into a stupidly wide grin without any preamble. “Hello there,  _ Sleepy-yama _ . Did I wake you?”

Kageyama gives an affirmative grunt as his answer. More shuffling scrapes against the phone’s microphone. “Why is it so dark there?”

“Huh?” Shouyou’s brow furrows.

“Where you’re at,” Kageyama grumbles. “It’s dark.”

Shouyou, thoroughly confused, glances around the room. The sun has yet to set and he’s definitely ensured that not a single corner of his apartment would be darkened when it did. Kageyama has somehow gotten even weirder. “No, it’s not. Are you really that tired?”

It sounds like Kageyama flops his head into a pillow and mutters a loose string of words that contain vague insults, both old and new. “Stupid. Your camera.”

Shouyou slowly removes the phone from his ear and scrutinizes the screen with a crease deeply etched between his eyebrows. The sight he’s greeted with immediately wipes his expression clean and ignites in his lungs. There lies Kageyama, bleary eyed in the dull light flowing through his curtains, dark hair rumpled to perfection and pointed chin resting atop his bare forearm. His lips are frozen between a scowl and an almost-smile, the vestiges of sleep still evident from the light pink imprint left on his jaw.

“Oh,” he squeaks past his parched tongue. “I guess I pressed the wrong button.”

Kageyama snorts. “You’re such an idiot.”

“ _ Rude! _ ”

Shouyou shifts his camera, resting the phone on his knee to move his entire face into the frame. He’s suddenly hyper aware of his chapped lips and glaring sunburn spattering along the ridge of his nose. He and Kageyama have talked to each other a few times, sure—that along with the occasional picture he’d send to spark conversation—but this is the closest they’ve been to face-to-face interaction in…a while. He hasn’t seen Kageyama, the normal tactless Kageyama media doesn’t always focus on, in far too long.

“You’re staring.”

Shouyou jerks back, the back of his head thudding against the wall. He winces. “No, I’m not.”

Kageyama rolls his eyes, deep irises landing right on the camera for a brief moment then flitting away quickly. Shouyou decidedly ignores the flipping in his stomach. “So, are you going to tell me why you’re calling?”

“Uh,” Shouyou grimaces sheepishly. God, he feels so  _ selfish _ . He woke Kageyama up for some stupid childish fear of the unknown. Stupid! “Pedro isn’t here tonight and I…may have spent a lot of today listening to scary stories?”

For a second, Shouyou thinks the connection is wavering. The ringing of white noise fills the air and seeps through his skin as Kageyama’s face is frozen in its perpetual post-waking up glory. Then Shouyou blinks and his expression is twisted into a harsh scowl. “ _ Why? _ ”

“I wanted to learn more—”

“But you  _ know  _ you’re easily scared by stupid shit!”

“Someone told me about a  _ headless mule _ , Kageyama! That’s actually scary!”

“I’ve heard worse.”

“Some people told me that the place where its head is supposed to be is  _ on fire _ .”

Kageyama’s eyes narrow and Shouyou mirrors him, a pout pulling at his bottom lip. Kageyama’s glower deepens, transforming from his  _ you’re such a dumbass _ frown into a thoughtful one. It’s harder to tell over the phone, when Kageyama is reduced to two-dimensional pixels trapped within the confines of Shouyou’s phone. Kageyama speaks in subtleties, something that Shouyou, after years of practice, has become strikingly attuned to. And now he has a slight crutch to overcome in order to keep up with his relatively good track record (which Shouyou will do gladly).

Kageyama sighs. “You called to tell me about that?”

“No,” Shouyou rushes to say. He can see the rosiness from his nose spread to the tips of his ears more than he can feel it. “I just wanted someone here.”

Kageyama cocks his head to the side. “Is there no one you can stay with for the night?”

Shouyou bites his lip, blush flaring down his neck. “I think I like this better.”

Blue eyes bore into the screen so intensely, Shouyou swears a hole will start to appear at any given moment. A blink. Then another. Shouyou worries his lip even more as he witnesses the lines carved around his eyes ease. “Even though I’m not good at talking on the phone?”

A laugh bubbles past Shouyou’s mouth. “You finally admit you aren’t good at something? Wow, Kageyama, you really  _ have _ changed since I’ve been gone.”

“Whatever,” Kageyama grits out, burying his face into the crook of his elbow as Shouyou giggles.

Kageyama mutters something along the lines of “ _ shut up”  _ while reaching for something out of frame. The screen darkens as a pillow flops right over the camera, the sound of it quivering as it flows from his speakers. Shouyou’s little laughs grow exponentially.

“Nooooo,” he whines. He gasps for breath, bringing his phone closer to his face. Only the top half of his face is on camera but his eyes alone crinkle with overflowing mirth. “Come back!”

“No,” comes the muffled reply, barely comprehensible.

Shouyou can’t help another round of chuckles. “Oh, come on.”

There’s shuffling on the other end of the dark screen. “You’re  _ embarrassing _ .”

“Wha—” Shouyou blanches.

“Don’t try to deny it.”

“But I’m not!”

“You only say things you really mean. That’s embarrassing.”

Shouyou flops sideways on his bed, resting his head on his bicep. “If I make you uncomfortable, you can tell me.” He really hopes he hasn’t let his… _ feelings _ run away again. His priority is helping Kageyama feel comfortable around him, to be the  _ friend _ he needs.

A sigh. The pillow is removed and the very top of Kageyama’s head peaks into view. “You don’t.”

Shouyou grins, relief immediately coursing through him. “I’m really glad."

“Are you sunburnt?” Kageyama’s eyes draw closer—only his eyes because the only thing in view is the furrow in his brow and an extreme close up of his irises. Shouyou can’t say he minds this really. It’s not every day someone can say they’ve been so close to Japan’s setter that they can count his eyelashes.

“Yeah.” Shouyou reaches to glide a finger along the damaged cartilage. “It’s not bad though. The only thing that really gets burned is my face.”

They continue on with this pattern of speaking, going through their own version of pleasantries that dissolve into scowls and chuckles. Shouyou’s heart is light and so utterly happy throughout the whole thing.

Contrary to popular belief, Shouyou is not  _ completely _ oblivious. He’s very aware that these palpitations, these uncontrollable physical reactions, are merely clues to an inner longing emanating from his very core. Somehow, this experience manages to be as intense as an impeding electric storm and as soft as the caress of sleep—though both can overtake him, suffocate him with a fondness potent enough to bring him to his knees.

It’s impossible to  _ not _ know when every stifled laugh makes him feel powerful enough to leave earth, when every stuttered attempt to make conversation feels more raw and  _ real _ than any tangible object could ever hope to be. Kageyama stirs impossibilities and creates solid ground. Shouyou doesn’t rely on him to keep him from falling, he’s found his own equilibrium both on and off the court. But emotions are more addictive than people give them credit for.

Shouyou has told Kageyama as much; a time in their third year, after he made the decision to travel and Kageyama had chosen to stay, when everything finally clicked with Shouyou. He remembers sitting across from one another, criss cross on the gym floor, knees brushing against one another. Shouyou murmured intimate confessions into the grand open space, words only meant for him and Kageyama. To his surprise, Kageyama returned the sentiment in fragmented sentences and too much scowling. They laughed afterwards, a giddy sound that still echoes in the empty spaces between the ventricles of Shouyou’s heart.

Ultimately though, they decided that their paths should diverge—they  _ had  _ to. They spent years working as a unit and now it was time for them to figure out what they could do without each other. Shouyou expressed a fear of constantly being compared with Kageyama and Kageyama frowned in confusion but soon nodded his support. They parted on better terms than before, freely expressing their emotions towards one another through gentle touches and secretive smiles. (This earned them both the title of  _ clueless _ but neither of them acknowledged it. They didn’t need to.)

Still, Shouyou can’t help but wonder if he’s being selfish by keeping Kageyama’s attention as much as he possibly can. It isn’t entirely intentional, they’re respectful of each other’s boundaries and their collective decision but he can’t help the guilt that presses at his consciousness.

“I’ve got to go get water,” Shouyou drags himself to the edge of his bed. “You’re coming on this adventure with me.”

Kageyama hums in response, lounging back against his head board and holding his phone further away from him. He looks ridiculously mussed and exhausted as he rubs a hand over his eyes and yawns lethargically.

Shouyou creeps to his doorway, poking his head out to check his surroundings. Kageyama huffs a laugh but Shouyou pointedly ignores him. “Off I go.”

“Why are you whispering?” Kageyama asks this question while also keeping his voice low.

“Because I’m out in the open,” Shouyou sticks his tongue out at the camera. “I have to be careful.”

“Ah, yes. I forgot that a mythical creature was going to track you down and murder you. But only if you’re alone in your living room.”

Shouyou props his phone up, putting a leg on the counter to reach the back of the top shelf (he really should do some dishes, yikes). “You won’t be making fun of me when you never hear from me again.”

Kageyama’s gaze roams over the screen only pausing when he notices Shouyou’s face back in the frame. “We still have to play each other,” Kageyama says, voice unwavering. “You’re not disappearing.”

Shouyou chuckles once, shoulders jerking with the sound. “You’re right. I’ll just tell the big scary monster ‘sorry! But the great Kageyama Tobio said I’m not going anywhere yet! Try again later.’”

“Yet?”

Shouyou fills his cup, inhaling deeply. “Do you want me around forever?”

It’s meant to be a teasing remark; however, it comes out tinier than he expected it to. He doesn’t dare to look at Kageyama.

“Yeah.”

Shouyou’s head shoots up, automatically magnetized to the direction of Kageyama’s voice. Kageyama has his face turned to the side, pink dusting across his cheekbones and flowing down his neck. It’s so absurdly adorable and Shouyou’s heart clenches in a way that is almost unhealthy. “Really?”

Kageyama shrugs and nods at the same time.

“Then I guess I’ll just have to come home to avoid the situation altogether,” Shouyou blurts, scooping up his phone.

“Wait, Hinata, are you—”

Shouyou sprints back to his room, moving as quickly as he possible could with a full glass of water sloshing around in his hands. He reaches his room and slams the door shut behind him.

“ _ Hinata _ .”

“What?” Shouyou clips back.

“Are you…does this mean…?”

“Well, yeah, dummy,” Shouyou chirps, excitement buzzing beneath his skin. “I told you it was a two-year program then I’m coming back.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah.  _ Oh _ .” Shouyou mimics with a grin. He settles back against his pillows as he sighs, contented to the silence between them.

“…Shouyou?”

Immediately, Shouyou is  _ very  _ intrigued. “Yeah?”

“Do you…” Kageyama flounders, glaring off in the distance. His lips are pinched and his brows are nearly touching. It’s a weird expression, even for Kageyama. “Do you…think we made the wrong decision? In our third year?”

Shouyou melts. Oh, that damned question. Why did that stupid, haunting question have to come out of Kageyama’s mouth? Because Shouyou  _ doesn’t know _ . He wants to say no but there’s something within him that  _ aches  _ for Kageyama. It’s as if his body is more aware of how he pushed this boy that he found away rather than hugging him closer than ever. God, he wants to say no but…is it selfish that everything else in him screams that the answer is yes?

“I’m not sure,” Shouyou replies honestly. “I really miss you, if that’s what you were wondering.”

Kageyama swivels his head so quickly Shouyou is scared he might’ve hurt himself. His mouth opens and closes as he (somehow) turns an even more vibrant red. “That’s good. I’m…glad.”

“The least you can do is tell me you miss me too,” Shouyou sulks playfully.

Kageyama growls, “I  _ hate _ you.” But there’s no bite to it.

“Close enough.” Shouyou can’t stop grinning. “Here, I’ll make a promise so we’ll have something else to think about.”

Kageyama doesn’t respond, only looks up with a nervous face that borders along the lines of bashful. Shouyou’s blood thrums fiery and reckless in his veins.

“I promise, when I get back to Japan, we’ll stand on the same stage and I’ll show you that I’m the greatest rival.” Shouyou inflates, words welling up until it  _ hurts _ . “I’m the best opponent for you, I’ll prove it.”

Kageyama swallows, licking his bottom lip as if he’s suddenly been drained of all moisture. “You don’t have to.” Kageyama clears his throat. “Not for me.”

Shouyou curses this screen. He curses it so  _ damn  _ much in this moment. Kageyama is right there in front of him, midnight eyes sparking in earnestness and face set into straight determined lines, and he cannot do anything but stare at him. Shouyou wants to transcend every physical law ever to be written; he wants  _ so badly _ to reach through the screen and press his forehead against Kageyama’s, to entangle himself in the clumsiest and tightest hug ever, to  _ finally _ press their mouths together until he can hardly breathe anymore.

“Then I’ll prove it to the world.” Shouyou grips his phone so tight, he thinks the skin on his knuckles might crack. “I’ll prove it to everyone else.”

“Okay,” Kageyama breathes. “I—yeah. But whoever loses pays for…dinner? I don’t know.”

Shouyou ceases to function for a brief moment. “Are you asking me on a date?”

Kageyama glances up through his lashes. “I guess? I assumed you’d want to—”

“I do!” Shouyou shouts. “I would really like that.”

Kageyama blinks, entirely too innocent and beautiful. “Alright. After our match. A date. That’s my promise to you.”

“I wouldn’t want it any other way.” Shouyou positively beams at him, splitting his own face in half with the sheer force of his own delight. 

Shouyou leans back against his pillow, moving on to a different topic of conversation and rambles about nothing in particular. Probably volleyball related, he surmises, though he can’t really tell. He’s comfortable and content here, on top of the covers, completely clothed and sticky with dried sweat as he listens to the drone of Kageyama’s deep voice.

Before Shouyou fully succumbs to sleep, he murmurs the sentence that has been plaguing his mind since the day he left Japan. “ _ I love you _ .”

Kageyama’s response is hazy but indisputable in Shouyou’s ears. “You too.”

A smile curves at his lips as he drifts away into the arms of unconsciousness.

**Author's Note:**

> They are in love, your honor.
> 
> Anyways! I'm @meettheroyalmes on twitter, if you wanna give me a follow or shout about Haikyuu with me. Thank you so much for reading! <3


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